Saturday, December 20, 2008

Woman, be thyself!

Hey, you cut-throat career women, WARNING - do not read further. Unless, of course, you have an open mind. Which is pretty unlikely. Because possesion of an open mind is predicated on having a warm heart-or at least an emotionally-sound psyche.
I have seen people look up to the women climbing the corporate ladders of a "man's world". Man's world??!! Who gave the world away to them? It is our world - men, women, and children. Everyone has a unique relationship and a different role to play in the world and in society. We give the 'world' to man when we acknowledge that the only succesful way of life is in the role he plays. Why do women work only to be able to afford that 5-bedroom house when all they can fill it with is distances between themselves and their families?
All credit and kudos to the woman who really needs to work - and manages to balance her work and home. A girl who works to pay off her college loans is living her life productively; a mother who needs to support the family's finances has my sincerest admiration. But the woman who decides she needs to work to get 'extra pocket money' or needs to add a swimming pool to their upgraded home deserves nothing but derision. Not only is she taking the job away from someone who really might need it, she is probably giving up on precious moments - going for ice cream with her children, or even a recherche hour of solitude.
Then there is that woman who picks an education not based on her interest in learning but on the attendant 'returns'. And then, of course, does a job which is 'in'. How exhausting it must be to live a life dependent on what someone else thinks, whether it is a man, a woman, or the whole entire world. Think for yourself, woman! It should not be your job, if it does not make you happy at the end of the day, and it certainly must not be your job, if you really do not need it.
You want that CEO position, go ahead and kill yourself over it. But do not expect us to take off our hats to you. Do not assume that it is well enough to dump your kids at the nearest, or even the fanciest, creche. Do not for a moment think it is worth even that lost moment with your child. Or a parent, or a friend who needs you. You are doing what you opted for, and your choice is about as creditable as - not less and certainly not more than - that of the woman who decides her priority is to stay home and keep it warm and clean.
Stop confusing work with success, and accomplishment with busy work, and fatigue with satisfaction.


  1. Well said Sarah. Living for "others" is not an easy job. But situation in any case gets worse when people start taking one for granted. Time invested with children is precious.
    Only an educated, more privileged and a secure person can say that men don't own this world. But unfortunately we still find many people constructing their daughters for just one purpose in life i.e how to serve men or how to manipulate men to attain success in their lives.
    Thanks Sarah for sharing it with us.

  2. A thought provoking article Sara! Contentment is a very subjective term. The intensity level may vary from individual to individual. In general, "life is not a bed of roses." Unfortunately, the majority of the women don't have a choice to stay home with their kids. Thanks to our wonderful economy! I have seen stay home mothers who assume that their presence is more than enough for the child. Most of the time they are on the phone, busy shopping, socializing, and watching movies. At the same time, an increase in dysfunctional families, suicide rate, disappearance of the moral values, are some of the biggest challenges faced by the western world. I feel one of the major underlying causes, is the type of woman who takes a job not out of necessity; but because she wants to maintain her lavish life style. I think there can be a balance between work and family. It would change the over all quality of family life.
    Just my thoughts!!!!

  3. This is interesting--but not quite sure if I agree with you. I do agree that some women work only for superficial things, pocket money etc. But I am not sure if I can be judgmental about that. For, obviously she has the necessary qualifications to get that job. And maybe she is putting that to use. Also I see it from another angle--that of empowerment. I feel very strongly about a woman's financial independence--I feel that gives a woman a lot of confidence--much needed in a society where women are generally subjugated--it is a way of ensuring there is no exploitation.
    So where do we draw the line--how much money is enough money in today's world/society? Deciding on a certain level of income is sufficient for a family depends on each individual--so isn't it a bit harsh on the career woman?
    These are some of my thoughts on this--no firm views yet.


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